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Blagues en anglais sur les navions

Publié : ven. sept. 05, 2008 9:43 pm
par clem42
Bonjour.

Mon prof d'anglais un brin penible nous a imposé de, en debut de cours, faire une blague (en anglais :sweatdrop) et le but étant de le faire rire pour avoir la meilleur note possible (en blague :busted_re:wacko:)

Je fait donc appel a vous si vous pour savoir si vous onnaissiez des blagues qui sont en relation ave les zavions, et si possible en anglais (sinon je traduirait).

D'avance merci

Publié : ven. sept. 05, 2008 10:00 pm
par 8th_Romano
http://shock.military.com/Shock/videos. ... 078&page=5

Tiens, t'as même la vidéo et les sous-titres :)

Publié : ven. sept. 05, 2008 11:09 pm
par Rob1
Va voir sur http://www.checksix-forums.com/showthread.php?t=135364 : certaines ont un certain "contexte" anglo-saxons et peuvent être traduites, comme celle sur le vétéran de la guerre de Falklands.

EDIT : ou les Australiens, aussi, elle est bien bonne. D'ailleurs ca fait du bien de relire tout ca

Publié : sam. sept. 06, 2008 3:14 pm
par ironclaude
En voilà quelques unes pour l'interro de Lundi prochain:

“Though I Fly Through the Valley of Death ... I Shall Fear No Evil ... For I am at 80,000 Feet and Climbing.”
(Sign over the entrance to the SR-71 operating location, Kadena: Japan).

You’ve never been lost until you've been lost at Mach 3. (Paul F .Crickmore-test pilot)

From an old carrier sailor - Blue water Navy truism: There are more planes in the ocean than submarines in the sky.

If the wings are traveling faster than the fuselage, it’s probably a helicopter—and therefore, unsafe.

When one engine fails on a twin-engine airplane you always have enough power left to get you to the scene of the crash.

Without ordnance, the USAF would be just another expensive flying club.

What is the similarity between air traffic controllers and pilots? If a pilot screws up, the pilot dies; If ATC screws up, the pilot dies.

Never trade luck for skill.

Weather forecasts are horoscopes with numbers.

Airspeed, altitude, and brains. Two are always needed to successfully complete the flight.

A smooth landing is mostly luck; two in a row is all luck; three in a row is prevarication.

Mankind has a perfect record in aviation; we never left one up there!

Flashlights are tubular metal containers kept in a flight bag for the purpose of storing dead batteries.

Flying the airplane is more important than radioing your plight to a person on the ground incapable of understanding or doing anything about it.

Advice given to RAF pilots during W. W. II: When a prang (crash) seems inevitable, endeavor to strike the softest, cheapest object in the vicinity as slowly and gently as possible.

Claude

Publié : sam. sept. 06, 2008 3:24 pm
par shingouz
Très bon :laugh:

Publié : sam. sept. 06, 2008 3:37 pm
par Ric
J'aime bcp celle sur l'USAF ^^

Publié : sam. sept. 06, 2008 3:46 pm
par ironclaude
La suite

Why does the Pope kiss the ground each time that he lands?
Did you ever fly with Alitalia?

Definition of jet lag : "finding your wallet in the refrigerator and not remembering what you did with the milk".

What's the difference between God and pilots?
God doesn't think he's a pilot

What's the purpose of the propeller?
To keep the pilot cool. If you don't think so, just stop it and watch him sweat!

Tower: "Delta 351, you have traffic at10 o'clock, 6 miles!"
Delta 351: "Give us another hint!We have digital watches!"

Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at7 PM. Please use the back door.

Claude

Publié : dim. sept. 07, 2008 3:56 pm
par ironclaude
Derniere partie !

Rules Of The Air for Pilots

1. Every takeoff is optional. Every landing is mandatory


2. If you push the stick forward, the houses get bigger. If you
pull the stick back, they get smaller. That is, unless you
keep pulling the stick all the way back, then they get bigger again.

3. Flying isn't dangerous. Crashing is what's dangerous.

4. It's always better to be down here wishing you were up there than up there wishing you were down here.

5. The ONLY time you have too much fuel is when you're on fire.

6. The propeller is just a big fan in front of the plane used to keep the pilot cool. When it stops, you can actually watch the pilot start sweating.

7. When in doubt, hold on to your altitude. No one has ever collided with the sky.

8. A 'good' landing is one from which you can walk away.

A 'great' landing is one after which they can use the plane again.

9. Learn from the mistakes of others. You won't live long enough to make all of them yourself.

10. You know you've landed with the wheels up if it takes full power to taxi to the ramp

11. The probability of survival is inversely proportional to the angle of
arrival. Large angle of arrival, small probability of survival and vice versa.

12. Never let an aircraft take you somewhere your brain didn't get to five minutes earlier.

13. Stay out of clouds. The silver lining everyone keeps talking about might be another airplane going in the
opposite direction. Reliable sources also report that mountains have been known to hide out in clouds.

14. Always try to keep the number of landing you make equal to the number of take-offs you've made.

15. There are three simple rules for making a smooth landing. Unfortunately no one knows what they are.

16. You start with a bag full of luck and an empty bag of experience. The trick is to fill the bag of experience before you empty the bag of luck.

17. Helicopters can't fly; they're just so ugly the earth repels them.

18. If all you can see out of the window is ground that's going round and round and all you can hear is
commotion coming from the passenger compartment, things are not at all as they should be.

19. In the ongoing battle between objects made of aluminium going hundreds of miles per hour and the ground going zero miles per hour, the ground has yet to lose.

20. Good judgment comes from experience. Unfortunately, the experience usually comes from bad judgment.

21. It's always a good idea to keep the pointy end going forward as much as possible.

22. Keep looking around. There's always something you've missed.

23. Remember, gravity is not just a good idea. It's the law. And it's not subject to repeal.

24. The three most useless things to a pilot are the altitude above you, runway behind you,
and a tenth of a second ago.


Bon là ce ne sont pas vraiment des blagues mais des conseils sérieux présentés sous forme de blagues. Du second degré, de l'humour Anglais en quelque sorte. Espérons que le Prof du même nom l'appréciera !

Claude

Publié : dim. sept. 07, 2008 5:24 pm
par firag
j'aimebien celle là :

vous ne vous êtes jamais perdu tant que vous ne vous êtes pas perdu à mach3.

tu m'étonnes :laugh:

et à part si ton prof est pilote ça va trop le faire marrer ce genre de blague

Publié : dim. sept. 07, 2008 6:56 pm
par clem42
Un grand merci a : 8th_Romano, Rob1 et ironclaude .

:notworthy

Reste a voir ce qu'en pense le prof !

A+

Publié : dim. sept. 07, 2008 7:10 pm
par Bawa
voilà, maintenant on attend tous ta note :tongue: :smartass:

Publié : dim. sept. 07, 2008 7:20 pm
par Black Wolf
et savoir quelle blague tu as choisi aussi

Publié : lun. sept. 08, 2008 12:36 pm
par Bensky
Dans le style, il y a les inévitables ''Say....''

http://www.aviation-humor.com/cms/view.php?id=1

Publié : lun. sept. 08, 2008 1:33 pm
par Warlordimi
Tu peux aussi essayer les explications des abréviations des compagnies:

Such A Bloody Experience Never Again
Always Late In Take-off Always Late In Arrival
Let Us Fuck The Hostess As No Steward Available
Take Another Plane
Please Inform Allah
Onassis Like Your Money Pay In Cash

Publié : lun. sept. 08, 2008 2:27 pm
par chameloon
clem42 a écrit :Reste a voir ce qu'en pense le prof !

A+
T'as plus qu'a esperer que ton prof ne soit pas sur C6 pour qu'il s'apercoive que tu fasses faire ton boulot par d'autres :)

Publié : lun. sept. 08, 2008 4:06 pm
par 0rion
T'as plus qu'a esperer que ton prof ne soit pas sur C6 pour qu'il s'apercoive que tu fasses faire ton boulot par d'autres
:sweatdrop

Publié : lun. sept. 08, 2008 7:40 pm
par ironclaude
Quoi ? se documenter, consulter des spécialistes :innocent: , c'est pas travailler ?

Claude

Publié : dim. mai 31, 2009 10:51 pm
par SmilingCow
Au fait... il a apprécié ton prof ? o_O